Has Second Life Ever Made You Sad?

Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened. 

Dr. Seuss  

I’ve been blogging lately about feelings and emotions in Second Life (SL.)

(Significant Other is hoping that I’m not giving advice.  What happened to our friends in Real Life (RL) that time had nothing to do with me!)

You might say that I’ve been opening up the hood (or bonnet for my British readers) of our psyches inworld and checking underneath. 

(Significant Other sighs and wonders aloud why can’t I just cover fashions like every other SL blogger.)

But, I’m finding that I can’t do this without touching the emotional third rail of sadness

inworld. 

(Significant Other screams and runs from the room.)

And, that third rail is has SL ever made you sad?

But, what is being sad all about?

In RL, loss of a loved one due to death, the end of a relationship or friendship, or the sudden and traumatic loss of part of our lives due to fire or storm as examples can give rise to sadness. 

Or, being treated unfairly or bullied can make us sad in RL too.

Then, there’s just being lonely and feeling left out.

It happens to all of us sooner or later.

How we manage it and move on from it determines how we live our lives in RL.

But, what about SL?  Can we have these same feelings of sadness arising from inworld events?

I submit that we can.

We can lose SL friends to death in RL.

Good friends can disappear never to return leaving us wondering why and hoping that they’re well.

Relationships and friendships end as frequently as they do in RL.

We can lose everything inworld to crashes, griefing, or identity theft. 

And, of course, SL is no haven from loneliness.

Maybe the only occurrence that can cause sadness in RL that we can’t experience

inworld is illness.  But, I’ve met many inworld whose sadness stems from RL illness. 

SL is not a game.

It’s very real for many of those who reside here. 

SL is an extension of our RL selves.

I always go back to what someone told me when I first rezzed in all those years ago, “Remember that behind every avatar is a real person with real feelings.”

I’ve never forgotten that advice. 

Our bodies may be virtual but our feelings are very real!

We can hurt inworld and experience sadness.

Which is why the rest of us should always be ready to step in to cheer someone up, and maybe, just maybe fall in love sometime!

What about you?

Have you ever been sad because of SL?

If you’d like to share your story, and I’ll guarantee anonymity, then please send it along and I’ll write another story! 

Thanks in advance and I hope everyone is happy out there right now! 

As always, I’m grateful to all inworld for their kindness and time in stopping to talk with a stranger who was passing through their lives. 

My Twitter handle is @webspelunker.  Please feel free to follow me and I’d be happy to follow you.

I can be found on Google+ as webspelunker Ghostraven.

My flickr Photostream is located here.

On Skype I’m webspelunker Ghostraven.

I welcome feedback from readers, please either comment on my blog or e-mail me at webspelunker@gmail.com . 

            If you would like to read about my other adventures in Second Life  please click here.

            Open roads and kind fires!

How Do You Emote Subtly in Second Life?

Is it really possible to tell someone else what one feels? 

Leo Tolstoy

Recently, I had a misunderstanding with a good friend in Second Life (SL). 

(Significant Other asks why should SL be any different than Real Life (RL).  I won’t digress here.)

We were having a conversation and I was joking.  A little later, I noticed my friend seemed a little withdrawn and terse.  (Significant Other is amazed that I noticed.  I may quit blogging when Significant Other is around.)  I asked what was the matter not thinking I was in anyway involved. (Significant Other says, “Typical!”)

To my surprise, my friend said they were offended.  What I had taken as kidding they had taken seriously, very seriously!  (I’m deliberately masking my friend’s identity and not

because they’re embarrassed to be associated with me!)

My friend and I discussed the matter and I apologized.  (Significant Other does give me points for this,)

But, this got me thinking about how limited our ability to subtly express our emotions and feelings inworld is.  (I’m not copping out here and blaming SL.)

How can we do this especially when we move from bland, everyday greetings into closer personal relationships in SL? 

Let’s discuss this for a bit!

The problem starts with how we communicate our feelings in RL.

We have a rich variety of methods available to us. 

Besides our words, there’s our voice, facial expressions, eyes, and body language.  Not to mention all the possible combinations thereof. 

(Sex has many other expressions of feelings and emotions in RL too.  But, since I’m still not that kind of blog, I won’t go there!)

Now, in SL, on the other hand, our options are somewhat more limited.

We have text and, for some, voice.

That’s it!

And, yes, we can use primitive late Twentieth Century emoticons too if we want.  (e.g., :) ;) Get the picture?)

There are animations inworld but these pretty much have minds of their own. 

We’re trained from an early age in RL how to express our emotions and feelings.  Most of us figure it out reasonably well.  Some even make a living make a living out of it as actors and actresses. 

However, inworld, the RL options are closed to us and we’re pretty much left to our own devices.

So, what happens?

Confusion, hurt feelings, and misunderstandings can result when we try to express ourselves beyond simple greetings and conversations.  Even voice can only take us so far.  Just ask anyone who’s ever played the party game telephone.

What about you?

Has the inability to satisfactorily emote feelings inworld ever caused you difficulties? 

How do you subtly express your emotions or feelings inworld?  Do you even try?

Please drop me a line and let me know!

If I get enough replies then I’ll do a follow-up story!

But, for now, just keep emoting!  

As always, I’m grateful to all inworld for their kindness and time in stopping to talk with a stranger who was passing through their lives. 

My Twitter handle is @webspelunker.  Please feel free to follow me and I’d be happy to follow you.

I can be found on Google+ as webspelunker Ghostraven.

My flickr Photostream is located here.

On Skype I’m webspelunker Ghostraven.

I welcome feedback from readers, please either comment on my blog or e-mail me at webspelunker@gmail.com . 

            If you would like to read about my other adventures in Second Life  please click here.

            Open roads and kind fires!