Friday, October 12, 2012

Sex and the Single Avatar in Second Life III: Nudity Does Not Mean Sex

I'm not for gratuitous nudity, but if there's humor, I don't have a problem.
Rebecca Romijn

I’m now at the third story in my series, Sex and the Single Avatar in Second Life.  So far, so good.  Traffic has been decent.  (Can always be better, feel free to distribute the link if you like my stories!)  Reader feedback has been favorable.  I guess I’ll keep writing!  As with my first story when a reader, Tiff Aristocrat, reached out to me and led me to my second story during the course of researching Paradise Sex Beach for that story I met someone who led me to write this story. 

Her name is Ilse Runo and I met her while she was sunbathing au natural on a beach at Paradise Sex Beach. Turns out, Ilse is a naturist in Real Life (RL) too.  This story is about her observations about the differences between naturism in Second Life (SL) and RL.  

Before we do that, some background to help the newly arrived.  For those of you who don’t know me, I’m a writer and explorer in SL.  I write about my travels across the grid and the people I meet and the experiences I have. (Usually involving me in some sort of embarrassing or ridiculous situation.)  My RL Significant Other patiently supports me in my efforts to become a famous blogger of the Metaverse.  She also greatly appreciates the anonymity of SL, less explaining to family and friends.  This story is the third in a series where I explore human sexuality in SL which I’m finding is something of a growth industry inworld.  I’m also finding that there’s a lot going on with the emotional side as well.  I’ll blog more about that in the future.

I strive for standards, nothing tawdry or lascivious.  There’s always Literotica for that.  I always quote my friend, Glorf Bulmer, as she would say, this won’t become that kind of blog.  Me?  I want to be informative and humorous and I always keep Bette Davis’ words in mind when writing in this series, “Sex is God’s joke on human beings.”

          Since arriving in SL, I’ve been noticing that nudity is fairly common in SL. I had my first encounters with nudity in the 1920’s Berlin sim and then ended up writing about naturism at the Wild Coast Naturist Resort.  At the latter I learned about the distinction inworld between nudity and naturism in SL.  Naturism (Caution, this link contains RL nudity.) in RL is more about enjoying being nude for its own sake and experiencing nature while in a state of undress.  Nudity in SL has more of a connotation of sex.  Here’s where I start talking with Ilse. 

          I begin our interview by asking her how long has she been a naturist in RL.  She replies her whole life adding that she guesses it runs in the family.  Being nude and being one with nature is what attracted her to the lifestyle. 

          Ilse started to look for naturist sites in SL because she enjoyed it in RL.  She laughs when she tells me that the big difference between naturism in RL and SL is that nudity is associated more with sex inworld than in RL. 

          I ask if the inworld sexuality ever become rude or aggressive.  Ilse says yes if that’s what someone wants but sometimes people are very pushy about trying to have their own way.  In fact, she belongs to a SL group dedicated to the idea that nudity does not mean sex. 

The next question is an obvious one for me, why does Ilse go to Paradise Sex Beach when there is so much sex in the open?  Ilse replies that it’s a really nice sim and there are really nice people to talk to.  Does the overtly sexual behavior bother her?  Ilse giggles as she says no it doesn’t and what can she do because is a sex beach after all?  (Ilse’s pretty open minded I have to say.) 

          I ask Ilse if there are other true naturist sites in SL like Wild Coast and does she visit them?  She lists Bare Naked Angels, Lupe's Magic Forest and Naturist Island.  Ilse doesn’t go to Wild Coast anymore because of the lag she experienced there.   

          My next questions have to do with what else Ilse does in SL.  She replies that talking with her naturist friends and getting to know them better, exploring places (which I find many are doing) and, of course, shopping.  (Ilse claims that she knew I was a guy in RL because of my limited interest in shopping.) Ilse used to build a lot inworld but finds she no longer has the time. 

My last question for Ilse is are naturists migrating to more sexually open behavior in SL or staying traditional over time in SL?  She smiles as she replies that yes she thinks so because for many people going nude is the same as having sex. 

          After my talks with Ilse, I had some time to think about what she’s said.  We both agree that many people do things in SL that they would never do in RL.  Unlike Ilse, I’m not a naturist in RL.  I believe that the anonymity of SL makes people feel safe and that they can get away with things inworld that they couldn’t in RL.  Sadly, this probably also applies to the coarsening of manners and social norms which is becoming all too common in RL these days.  (And, no, I don’t think it’s because I’m hanging around with a bad crowd.  Significant Other keeps a tight rein on my RL social life.) 

          I have no solutions here.  I’m merely writing about what I observe and I hear.  But, like many bad behaviors whether in SL or RL, they can only continue when we, yes “we”, permit them to happen and don’t call out the culprits.  If you see rude behavior, step up, and call it out.  This isn’t RL where you have to worry about getting punched in the mouth.  The target of the rudeness will appreciate it and I’ll guarantee you’ll feel better for it.     

          I would to thank Ilse for her time and hospitality.  I would also like to thank her for her candor and opening up to me with her answers.     

          In future stories in this series, I’ll continue to write about these different aspects of human sexuality in SL.  And, yes, I do mean human because as many continually remind inworld there’s a real person with real feelings behind that avatar we’re interacting with. 

          I welcome anyone who would like to share their experiences or opinions of SL sexuality with me.  I’d like to include these in my future stories in this series.  I look forward to hearing from you! 

As always, I’m grateful to all for their kindness and time in stopping to talk with a stranger who was passing through their lives.

Below are a few pictures of the places in SL that I visited for this story.  And, no, there is neither nudity nor activity of a sexual nature contained therein.  If you want to see that then you’ll have to go there yourself! 

I welcome feedback from readers, please either comment on my blog or e-mail me at . 

     If you would like to read about my other adventures in Second Life
please click here.

Photo No. 1 Ilse Runo

Photo No. 2 Paradise Sex Beach



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