Sex and the Single Avatar in Second Life III: Nudity Does Not Mean Sex

I'm not for gratuitous nudity, but if there's humor, I don't have a problem.

 

Rebecca Romijn

 

I’m now at the third story in my series, Sex and the Single Avatar in Second Life.  So far, so good.  Traffic has been decent.  (Can always be better, feel free to distribute the link if you like my stories!)  Reader feedback has been favorable.  I guess I’ll keep writing!  As with my first story when a reader, Tiff Aristocrat, reached out to me and led me to my second story during the course of researching Paradise Sex Beach for that story I met someone who led me to write this story. 

Her name is Ilse Runo and I met her while she was sunbathing au natural on a beach at Paradise Sex Beach. Turns out, Ilse is a naturist in Real Life (RL) too.  This story is about her observations about the differences between naturism in Second Life (SL) and RL.  

Before we do that, some background to help the newly arrived.  For those of you who don’t know me, I’m a writer and explorer in SL.  I write about my travels across the grid and the people I meet and the experiences I have. (Usually involving me in some sort of embarrassing or ridiculous situation.)  My RL Significant Other patiently supports me in my efforts to become a famous blogger of the Metaverse.  She also greatly appreciates the anonymity of SL, less explaining to family and friends.  This story is the third in a series where I explore human sexuality in SL which I’m finding is something of a growth industry inworld.  I’m also finding that there’s a lot going on with the emotional side as well.  I’ll blog more about that in the future.

I strive for standards, nothing tawdry or lascivious.  There’s always Literotica for that.  I always quote my friend, Glorf Bulmer, as she would say, this won’t become that kind of blog.  Me?  I want to be informative and humorous and I always keep Bette Davis’ words in mind when writing in this series, “Sex is God’s joke on human beings.”

          Since arriving in SL, I’ve been noticing that nudity is fairly common in SL. I had my first encounters with nudity in the 1920’s Berlin sim and then ended up writing about naturism at the Wild Coast Naturist Resort.  At the latter I learned about the distinction inworld between nudity and naturism in SL.  Naturism (Caution, this link contains RL nudity.) in RL is more about enjoying being nude for its own sake and experiencing nature while in a state of undress.  Nudity in SL has more of a connotation of sex.  Here’s where I start talking with Ilse. 

          I begin our interview by asking her how long has she been a naturist in RL.  She replies her whole life adding that she guesses it runs in the family.  Being nude and being one with nature is what attracted her to the lifestyle. 

          Ilse started to look for naturist sites in SL because she enjoyed it in RL.  She laughs when she tells me that the big difference between naturism in RL and SL is that nudity is associated more with sex inworld than in RL. 

          I ask if the inworld sexuality ever become rude or aggressive.  Ilse says yes if that’s what someone wants but sometimes people are very pushy about trying to have their own way.  In fact, she belongs to a SL group dedicated to the idea that nudity does not mean sex. 

The next question is an obvious one for me, why does Ilse go to Paradise Sex Beach when there is so much sex in the open?  Ilse replies that it’s a really nice sim and there are really nice people to talk to.  Does the overtly sexual behavior bother her?  Ilse giggles as she says no it doesn’t and what can she do because is a sex beach after all?  (Ilse’s pretty open minded I have to say.) 

          I ask Ilse if there are other true naturist sites in SL like Wild Coast and does she visit them?  She lists Bare Naked Angels, Lupe's Magic Forest and Naturist Island.  Ilse doesn’t go to Wild Coast anymore because of the lag she experienced there.   

          My next questions have to do with what else Ilse does in SL.  She replies that talking with her naturist friends and getting to know them better, exploring places (which I find many are doing) and, of course, shopping.  (Ilse claims that she knew I was a guy in RL because of my limited interest in shopping.) Ilse used to build a lot inworld but finds she no longer has the time. 

My last question for Ilse is are naturists migrating to more sexually open behavior in SL or staying traditional over time in SL?  She smiles as she replies that yes she thinks so because for many people going nude is the same as having sex. 

          After my talks with Ilse, I had some time to think about what she’s said.  We both agree that many people do things in SL that they would never do in RL.  Unlike Ilse, I’m not a naturist in RL.  I believe that the anonymity of SL makes people feel safe and that they can get away with things inworld that they couldn’t in RL.  Sadly, this probably also applies to the coarsening of manners and social norms which is becoming all too common in RL these days.  (And, no, I don’t think it’s because I’m hanging around with a bad crowd.  Significant Other keeps a tight rein on my RL social life.) 

          I have no solutions here.  I’m merely writing about what I observe and I hear.  But, like many bad behaviors whether in SL or RL, they can only continue when we, yes “we”, permit them to happen and don’t call out the culprits.  If you see rude behavior, step up, and call it out.  This isn’t RL where you have to worry about getting punched in the mouth.  The target of the rudeness will appreciate it and I’ll guarantee you’ll feel better for it.     

          I would to thank Ilse for her time and hospitality.  I would also like to thank her for her candor and opening up to me with her answers.     

          In future stories in this series, I’ll continue to write about these different aspects of human sexuality in SL.  And, yes, I do mean human because as many continually remind inworld there’s a real person with real feelings behind that avatar we’re interacting with. 

          I welcome anyone who would like to share their experiences or opinions of SL sexuality with me.  I’d like to include these in my future stories in this series.  I look forward to hearing from you! 

As always, I’m grateful to all for their kindness and time in stopping to talk with a stranger who was passing through their lives.

Below are a few pictures of the places in SL that I visited for this story.  And, no, there is neither nudity nor activity of a sexual nature contained therein.  If you want to see that then you’ll have to go there yourself! 

I welcome feedback from readers, please either comment on my blog or e-mail me at webspelunker@gmail.com . 

     If you would like to read about my other adventures in Second Life please click here.

Photo No. 1 Ilse Runo

Photo No. 2 Paradise Sex Beach

Photo No. 3 Wild Coast Naturist Resort

Photo No. 4 Island of Bare Naked Angels

 

Among the Naturists

What spirit is so empty and blind, that it cannot recognize the fact that the foot is more noble than the shoe, and skin more beautiful that the garment with which it is clothed?

Michaelangelo

          Earlier, when I blogged about my two visits to a nudist function in the 1920’s Berlin sim in Second Life, a couple of readers commented that if I was interested in checking out nudism inworld then I should visit The Wild Coast Naturist Resort.  I was told that this was a full time nudist location with decorum. 

          Well, I’m not always sure if places known for their decorum will necessarily want to have anything to do with me.  But, I’ve gotten used to rejection in life, both SL and Real Life (SL).  So, I decide to go visit. 

          Wild Coast is a nudity required sim.  Here, I was committing to more than an hour in a controlled environment as I’d done on my two previous forays into nudity.  But, after having wandered around strangers with all of us nude previously, this didn’t seem like all that much of a big deal anymore.  (Maybe there is something to the old saying that once you start doing it, it becomes natural.  Sorry, bad joke.)

          During one of my initial research trips, I met Sweety Basevi who functions as the general manager for the resort.  She agreed to meet me for an interview and I was all set.

          Before I go any further, I want to talk about terminology.  (Give me a break, I’m a writer, words are very important to me.)  I keep saying “nudist” or use derivations of the word.  Sweety very quickly pointed put to me that Wild Coast is a naturist (Caution: link contains pictures of nudity.) and not a nudist resort like other sims inworld.  Looking at the resort’s rules shows why.  Wild Coast is naturist in the classic sense.  People come together in a state of undress to enjoy one another’s company and enjoy SL unclothed just as naturists do in RL.  Public sexual displays are frowned upon and can get one booted out.  One prominent rule posted in Wild Coast is that men cannot have erections because Wild Coast is a mature sim in SL parlance and from a female perspective, it is threatening and intrusive.  (If only RL were that simple.)  There is another sim, Turtle Coast, which is an adult sim and is more liberal.  (Now that I’m so comfortable running around in the altogether, maybe another story in the future?) 

          With that cleared up, let me return to my interview with Sweety.  Like me she is nude.  Standing a little shorter than me (Come to think of it, how tall am I in SL?) with windblown (Aren’t AO’s something else?) shoulder length brunette hair, and tattoos, she is tanned from all her inworld hours spent at the beach.  (Look, if I said it was all the result of some clever programming in somebody’s basement in Detroit, it just wouldn’t have sounded as good would it?) 

          We meet at the Wild Coast resort at the appointed time and I begin with my questions. I ask about the start of Wild Coast.  Sweety replies that it is the third sim of Kaiya Islands and when a decision was made five years ago to open it, there was also a decision that it be a naturist site. 

I inquire about the sim’s current moderate rating as opposed to adult.  Sweety explains that this goes back to the earlier PG and mature ratings.  Due to other business activities like land rentals the decision was made to stay with the moderate rating when the ratings changed.  This is when Turtle Coast was established as an adult sim.  She continues saying that flirting is the most typical activity that occurs in Wild Coast and while there are secluded areas affording privacy, they are very careful about staying within the ratings guidelines set forth by Linden Lab (LL). 

My next question is about the one time membership fee of $450L charged when one joins.  Sweety explains how the fees help to pay the tiers for the venue, as well as the staff that work here, helping to ensure that everyone has a great time in a welcoming and safe environment.  From my visits, I can say that they have succeeded. 

From my recent visits with the SL BSDM community I know that many there practice the lifestyle in both SL and RL, I ask Sweety if she has seen this with naturism?  She responds that she understands how that can happen and suspects that people may first try naturism in SL and then be more comfortable with it in RL. 

I then ask her about why she’s a naturist in SL.  Sweety says working with the Islands, she goes where she’s needed.  She was a bit reluctant to strip initially she admits.  But after a short period of time, she got over it and now it’s second nature to her to be naked, she laughs as she tells me this.  Sweety says she can now sympathize with people who come here for the first time and are not used to being naked.  (I can sympathize as well.) 

Our conversation turns to how being naked in SL is easier than in RL.  (Those wandering eyes and normal male reactions I’ve written about elsewhere.)  Sweety states that we still associate our avatars with our own feelings and inhibitions.  She observes that once a newcomer has been naked for five minutes or so, they actually stop feeling self-conscious.  I wonder if it has something to do with us looking a lot better in SL than we do in RL? 

Social activities, as Sweety explains, besides the aforementioned flirting, include DJ's, concerts, and parties.  We discuss the appeal of Wild Coast.  Sweety uses terms like welcoming, enjoyable, and safe.  She admits this is probably the result of the controls in place.  There is none of the rude behavior that I’ve seen or friends have reported to me about other sims.  Whenever I arrive, I notice that others are rezzing in as well and as they enter, people call out their names and greet them. I haven’t seen that in too many other places inworld.  There appears to be a very tight community here in Wild Coast.

Sweety rethinks her use of the word “controls” and suggests that it’s more about making sure the rules are followed enhancing the members’ experience.  She speaks of the enjoyable vibes at the resort. 

Sweety also credits the staff for getting and keeping things going, and are truly awesome in her words. The friendliness, she thinks has a lot to do with the members themselves. For her, they are wonderful.  (I get the sense that this woman really loves her job.)  Coincidentally, while interviewing Sweety, a friend IM’s me and asks what I’m doing.  I reply that I’m doing an interview at a naturist resort.  She responds asking if I’m at the most famous one in SL, Wild Coast.  Turns out she’s a member too.  The grid’s getting smaller! 

The membership at 24,000 is very large.  (I wish I had that many readers!)  Average daily traffic for the sim is 19,500 which is another good number.  The biggest problems that Sweety encounters with members are those who try to break the no clothes, no shoes, and no erections rules.  (I have a very open minded SL friend, actually, she’s more of an anarchist, who has a problem with the resort’s no clothes rule.  She believes it’s another imposition of authority.  I’ll probably find her inworld someday dressing in protest of something or other.)

We talk next about what are the most popular spots within Wild Coast with the members.  Sweety says the public area at the arrival point and the main dance area by the beach are probably the two most popular locations at the resort.  The secluded areas are also popular for folks to go off to when they want some privacy to get to know one another better. 

My time with Sweety comes to an end and I thank her before taking my leave. 

Wild Coast is everything that I was told it would be. A friendly, safe, and enjoyable environment fostering friendship among residents.  Besides the social aspects, the resort is beautifully done and always has good mood music playing.  For anyone looking for a naturist experience in SL, I recommend Wild Coast.  Yes, there is a fee.  However, it’s trivial compared to what can be gained. 

The resort, in my opinion, follows in the tradition of RL naturist communities which were about enjoying nature and other people without the restrictions and prejudices brought on by clothing. 

One final point, I paid for my own membership fee to the resort so I could walk about and check things out for myself.  I will also return looking for new material for my blogs. 

I would like to thank Sweety Basevi for her time and openness with me. 

As always, I’m grateful to all for their kindness and time in stopping to talk with a stranger who was passing through their lives. 

I welcome feedback from readers, please either comment on my blog or e-mail me at webspelunker@gmail.com . 

     If you would like to read about my other adventures in Second Life please click here.

Photo No. 1  Sweety Basevi

Photo No. 2  Wild Coast Arrival Area and Entrance

Photo No. 3  Public Area

Photo No. 4  Members Only Common Area

Photo No. 5  Members Only Secluded Area